Borrowed and Blue
by inksmudged
Summary: The Realms have been brought to order, and now Gemma is getting married. But who is the lucky man? GemmaKartik GemmaSimon


_Gemma's wedding._

There is a tap at my window. I rise slowly from my bed, nervous. I am ever-conscious of the fact that this is the last night I will go to sleep as a virgin. We are at Grandmama's country home in Surrey, and my bedroom is on the ground floor. I go to the window, and heft it open carefully.

"Kartik," I breathe his name, a happy sigh. He smiles softly, his honey-brown eyes soft as he regards me, leaning against the window frame. There is a touch of sadness to his smile, and it makes my heart heavy. "It's bad luck to see the bride before the wedding," I chide him.

Kartik's smile fades. "I believe that superstition is reserved solely for the bridegroom."

My smile drops away as well. If only _he _was my groom… But it was never meant to be. We are from two different worlds, and the two can only meet in the secret corners of another realm.

"We will always have the realms," I insist, trying to regain my good humor.

Kartik shakes his head ruefully. "No, Gemma. I will go, and leave you in peace. We've done what needed doing. And now, I think it's best if we just go our separate ways, don't you?"

My brow furrows and I scowl at him, trying to discern his train of thought. Why would he take away his friendship? After a tempestuous courtship, we realized – reluctantly on my part – that we could never be. If Kartik hadn't been so stubborn, I would've run away with him, forgetting my family entirely. But, no… he did not want me. And I would not beg. Just as I will not beg now.

"Why have you come here?" I demand angrily. "To tell me you no longer wish to be even friends? To cut me out of your life entirely?"

Kartik sighs and looks up at the sky. The strength of his jaw and fine curve of his mouth taunt me. I want to reach out and trace his contours, taste his skin, know his soul…

"I came to say goodbye, Gemma. To wish you well. The darkness of our past is gone, and now you have a bright future. I won't cast my shadow over it."

I turn away from him, hiding the tears that pool in my eyes. My voice is strong when I reply. "Goodbye Kartik."

He is silent. When I turn to confront him, he is gone.

-- -- --

I stand in the church vestibule next to Tom. Father is too weak from his addiction to escort me down the aisle, so Tom will stand in his place. I take a shaky breath, clutching my fingers tightly about my bouquet.

"What am I doing?" I ask Tom in a nervous whisper. Tom smoothes my hair kindly, tucking a stray lock behind my ear. He looks pale, himself.

"_Do _you know what you are doing?" he asks, surprising me.

"Simon Middleton is a viscount's son. He's charming, and handsome, and wealthy," I say breathlessly. It comes out like recitation.

"Yes, he is," Tom agrees, but there's something in his voice that makes me think he doesn't entirely approve.

"What do you mean?" I ask, looking sharply at him.

Tom sighs. "Gemma, I know you think I'm a terrible brother –"

"No I don't," I deny feebly.

"But I really have always wanted only the best for you. Truly."

"Tom –"

"I just want you to be happy."

I look up, blinking harshly to keep tears from streaking my cheeks. Likely the wedding guests will only think me overcome with joy, but Tom will know the real reason. "I am happy," I whisper. "Simon is an ideal husband."

Tom nods, but says nothing more.

When the bride's march begins, Tom smiles and offers me his arm. "Ready Miss Doyle? You will soon be Mrs. Middleton."

I take Tom's arm and allow him to lead me down the aisle. Simon stands at the altar, beaming as he watches my approach. Felicity and Ann are seated at the end of a pew, each offering me a small smile as I pass. Ann's is hesitant, guarded. Felicity's is tight and grim. The both of them tried to argue me out of marrying Simon, but I would not be persuaded.

Tom hands me over to Simon with a small kiss on the cheek, before taking his seat between Father and Grandmama. I look into Simon's smiling face and force a smile of my own. He will never know that he is merely borrowing my heart from the person it truly belongs to.

I cannot make myself focus on the marriage. My eyes are unseeing, turned inward, to a slideshow of my past. _I see my mother, dying before the shadows take her… meeting me in the Realms… guiding me. I see Pippa, beautiful and alive, then gaunt and terrible – a creature of the Winterlands. And finally, I see Kartik, sweet and protective, secretive. But he's gone. After all that we've been through together, and he leaves._

Simon's hands squeeze mine, and he takes the ring proffered by his best man. Repeating after the vicar, he slides the ring onto my finger, "With this ring, I thee wed."

I follow suit, seeing Kartik's face as I slide the ring onto his finger.

"I now pronounce you man and wife."

_Yes, it's a bit sad. If I get a lot of reviews, I may make it longer. I have more ideas for this, but I'll let it stand on its own if people aren't interested._


End file.
